A Theoretical Edition

Dear Ally,

Why has Louis Althusser decided to make my life miserable by not clearly defining “ideologies” or “interpellation”?

Best,
Trish

* * *

Oh Trish. My poor Trish.

I wish I could tell you that it’s because he doesn’t like your face. I wish that I could blame it on Optimus Prime, or an Althusser-zombie-Hitler alliance. I wish it were that easy to explain away.

But the truth is far more painful. Because the truth is, on a basic molecular structure, Althusser is just like you and I.

The “You Shmooze, You Lose” Edition

The Incredibly Intelligent Irene from Iowa inquires:

To the fantastically amazing Ms. Ally,

How would one deal with an overconfident classmate in graduate school where egos are part of the game? This same classmate shmoozes with the best of them and profs love him. Plus he’s actually incredibly smart. I’m just as smart but not a kiss-ass!

Intelligent Irene

*   *   *   *   *

My dearest and most highly esteemed Irene,

Ahhhh dear, the perils of the post-graduate pretender! I am, luckily, far untouched from this phenomenon, however rumours have reached me that such fools do exist.

I must admit that I find it difficult to comprehend such behaviour myself. I mean, there is always going to be a certain degree of nerdly excitement involved in academic discussions. The brown noser, on the other hand – also known as kiss-ass, suck-up, apple-polisher, or butt-monkey – displays a constant flow of tongue-in-ass behaviour which annoys fellow students while managing to stay entirely off the radar of most professors.