The “Home for the Holidaze” Edition

Dear Ally,

It breaks my heart that you are thinking of ending the glory that is Ask Ally. I must apologize for my apparent lack of appreciation of your work – I’ve just been busy, ok?

Anywho, I have a question and it’s a holiday-themed one as well. Here it is: Why is it that every year I get super pumped for Christmas, but when I finally make it home for holidays, that joy is swiftly and inevitably crushed by insane family members? I am beginning to suspect that family is much better in theory than in practice. Thoughts?

*****

Dear Melanie,

Well, perhaps, if you’re going to be so nice about it, I won’t shut down Ask Ally. But posting will definitely be few and far between for a while. I’ve had an absolutely insane six months, and I have another insane six months ahead of me. January in particular I am expecting to literally suck actual, physical balls. I fully expect to see January down on its knees, goin’ at ‘er. It’s going to be wicked, and I mean that in the most sarcastic possible way.

However, as regards your question: I’ve been having a think on this one over the last few weeks. This is because the last few weeks have been the lead up to, and then the realisation of, my first Christmas away from home. Naturally, I went through the usual stages:

The “Happy Holidays? My Foot” Edition

Damn right I’m back! Should I be? No. Not at all, since I have at least nine other things I could – and really should be doing right now.

But I shall ignore everything else for a little while. Rejoice.

In a slightly delayed response, I will attend to Dan’s question. He writes,

Dear Ally,

Being a child of divorce I find the holidays to be a particularly stressful time. Rushing from one house to the other in an attempt to see both parental units; too many celebrations and never any time to put my feet up and relax.

My question is this: what is the best way to deal with the stress resulting from this broken home x-mas mambo whilst still seeing my whole family?

Shazam,
Dano the Mano from parts unknown

*   *   *   *   *

My Dearest Mr. Themano,

I sympathize with your plight entirely. And even though it’s now a full week into the new year, I find that these things have a way of repeating themselves, and so I shall answer your question approximately two-or-three weeks after it would save you any heartache.